Body Weapon (1999)
Reviewed by: ewaffle on 2006-08-03
Summary: As bad as it gets
“Body Weapon” is so bad that there isn’t really any point in listing its various failures, although the bipolar swings in the confidence, martial arts skill and appearance of Chan Siu-ling is the worst of them. It is an impossible role—the character goes from sizzling sexpot to super tough avenger to witless incompetent for no reason. She kills one of her targets by smashing heavy glass bottles over his head until he collapses then stabbing him repeatedly with a huge fork but then as to be talked into unlocking a door and climbing over a fence. Jessica Rabbit said “I’m not bad. I’m just drawn that way” in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit”. Chan Siu-ling is bad—terrible, actually—and she is written that way. The very attractive Angie Cheung undertook a role that would defeat Sarah Bernhardt so the fact that she walked through it can’t be held against her.

The first few minutes of the movie telegraph how egregious it will be. The initial scene is of a horrific rape and murder of a young couple by three maniacs. It then becomes, without transition, a cop/buddy movie then wanders off into incoherence. Mr. Blue mentions how Abel Ferrara handled a rape scene in “The Bad Lieutenant”. In another of his movies, “Ms. 45”, the main character is raped twice but in neither case is there the lip-smacking voyeuristic enjoyment shown here and one her attackers winds up dismembered, wrapped in newspaper and stuffed in a freezer.

There a few flashes of competence—Angie Cheung is costumed very well and using the hanging corpse of a murder victim as a shield during a fight was a good touch—but they were pretty well buried by the almost unbelievably bad script, which didn’t even make internal sense. For example, Chan Siu-ling told Officer Wu that she would have married him if only he had told her that he loved her. This was shortly after he had dropped to his knees in public to tell her exactly that.

And of course there was the douche scene...
Reviewer Score: 1